Watch It Burn
by Trebla
Summary: This is a story about a girl who likes to set fire to the world, just to watch it burn. In doing so, the Akatsuki become interested...and so, in time, does Deidara... M for language, probably.


**this is your special surprise!!!** thank you all for reading my Kakashi story (those of you who heard about this through that) and if you're new to this, hey there! :D i won't be updating this until You're My Favorite Guilty Pleasure (or YMFGP) is finished, but i wanted to do something special for the tenth chapter! :D so yeah, thanks again for your support and dedication, and please, continue on!

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I leapt up into a tree and turned to watch the huge council building crumble into dust. Giggling, I gave the tiny village a little farewell and returned my hammer, Haburi, back to its sheath on my back. The wooden hammer was as tall as a grown man, and the head of it was as big around as an oak tree. One side was imprinted with my personal seal, two crossed hammers with a raven in flight in front of them. I used the seal after every bit of work I did, smashing the raised design into the ground so people would see that it was my handiwork. I didn't want some amateur stepping up and claiming to be the cause of mayhem that was actually my doing.

I'd spent many years training with Haburi, so the huge weapon's weight didn't bother me anymore. In fact, feeling the weight of my hammer strapped across my back was rather comforting. The only time I ever felt more at ease was when Haburi was in my hands. That hammer was my baby.

Turning back to the dark forest in front of me, I skipped nimbly through the trees, away from the destruction I'd just caused. I'd never been a fan of rules and codes, and it seemed to me that that particular little town had one too many. So, I destroyed their council building. Of course, I'd made sure that the people inside would suffer only minor injuries before I swung the fatal blow. I wasn't a killer. I just liked to stir up a little trouble now and then. It kept things fresh, kept people on their toes. My raven companion, Karasu, squawked as if in agreement as she flew beside me, easily keeping pace as I bounced through the trees.

My name is Kuroi Tezema. They call me the Mischief Maker, and today was the day the Akatsuki took notice of me.

I stopped to rest a few hours after my departure from the scene of the damaged council building. Pulling Haburi from my back, I leaned it against the tree I was standing next to. Unbuckling the leather sheath, I let it fall to the ground and let out a sigh of relief as I rubbed the spots on my body where the hammer and the leather had scraped against my skin. Yes, I felt more comfortable when Haburi was on my back, but the large hammer wasn't good for long-distance travel, especially through trees.

Patting the black hammer's head affectionately, I sank down into the grass and searched through my pack until I pulled out a bag of grapes, an apple, and a few peaches. I preferred eating fruits, but I wouldn't complain if someone set down a nice juicy steak in front of me. Hell, I'd probably eat it if it were raw. I wasn't one to waste food.

Opening the grapes, I picked two off the stem and threw them up in the air. Only one came down, and I caught it in my mouth and repeated the process. Karasu was perching in the tree above me, and this was our normal feeding ritual. Grapes were her favorite foods, as they were bite-sized, contained no pesky seeds or pits, and she seemed to enjoy playing this little game while we ate.

Throwing another grape up to Karasu, I grabbed one of the peaches and bit into it absentmindedly, observing the area around me.

Something glimmered in the bushes on the other side of the clearing I was in. I continued eating my peach, keeping my eyes lazily drifting around the clearing, while my brain was racing, trying to figure out what the glimmer could have been.

There weren't any streams around here, and it wouldn't make sense if there was a random deposit of rock, because there were no rocks of the kind around here.

That left one possibility. A forehead protector, worn by a ninja.

I let out the tiniest of sighs, finishing off my peach. Getting up and stretching, I got an idea. Casually, I tossed the peach pit at the area that I had seen the glimmer of metal.

Now, the ninja had two options as they saw the peach pit hurtling towards their heads. One, they could remain totally still and let the peach pit bounce off their forehead protector, which would create a very audible _ping _that anyone would surely notice. Or, they could try and catch the pit, resulting in obvious movement and even rustling of the bushes in which they were concealed, revealing their presence instantly.

I didn't look back to see what had happened, but I warned Karasu of the possible danger by using a system of clicks that we had developed over the years. It was a kind of code that we reserved for battle purposes only, so that our enemies couldn't decipher our next move.

Karasu didn't respond, like I'd asked her to, and we both waited to hear something.

Nothing.

Frowning to myself, I began to pack my food away, angling myself in such a way that I could see the general area across the clearing from the corner of my eye. I didn't see the pit, which should have meant that the concealed ninja had caught it, but I hadn't heard a single sound from across the clearing, except for the rustling of leaves in the wind…

Wait a minute. There was no wind.

"Shit!" I flattened myself against the ground just in time as a needle flew over my head and buried itself in the trunk of the tree, not an inch above me. I flipped myself sideways and grabbed Haburi's handle, quickly pulling myself upright as I turned to confront my assailants.

My attackers stood in the middle of the clearing, facing me. They were wearing hats with white strips of fabric hanging down in front of them that mostly obscured their faces, and cloaks which had high collars that hid the lower half of their faces, and had a cloud design in red on them. The clouds struck a chord within my brain, but I couldn't quite place where I knew the pattern from.

One of my ambushers had long blonde hair that was tied up in a ponytail on his head, and bangs that covered his left eye. The other was very…weird. I could just make out his face from behind the white strips of cloth, and saw that it was covered by a mask, and that he wore his hair in corn rows. Underneath his cloak, he looked almost bloated, like there was more to his body than met the eye. It made me a little nervous, not knowing what weapons he might have hidden underneath.

I narrowed my eyes as I stared at them, Haburi at the ready in case one moved to attack me. Instead, the one with the corn rows spoke.

"Our leader has requested you meet with him. We suggest you come with us peacefully, or we will have to use force." His voice was toneless, despite being so gravelly, and I found it a little unnerving, the way he stared at me unblinkingly, without moving a muscle. I shrugged it off and snorted, looking disdainful as I leaned on my hammer.

"It appears as though you've already used force," I said, gesturing to the needle still stuck in the wood of the tree. "And we both know I probably won't go with you unless you tell me who you are."

The "probably" seemed to throw Blondie for a loop. "Probably, yeah?" he echoed, looking surprised. Most likely he had been expecting an all-out brawl, where they would end up dragging me by my hair to their leader. This was a figure of speech, of course, as my short spiky hair was barely more than two inches or so in length.

"Yeah, probably," I repeated. "For all I know, you two could be creepy rapists who want me for my short and curvy body." I looked down at myself, aware that when God had been passing out parts, I'd gotten a pretty good deal. Nice boobs, generous curves, and a pretty face. All I'd lost out on was height and skinniness. I wasn't by any means fat, but I felt that losing a few pounds wouldn't hurt me.

Cornie didn't even blink, but Blondie snorted. "Yeah, right, un," he said. "I don't think I'm desperate enough for a midget."

My eye started twitching, and my vision turned red at the edges. "What did you just call me?" I asked, my voice brimming with barely suppressed rage.

Blondie grinned, knowing he'd hit a nerve. "A midget," he responded.

"You have no idea who you're dealing with, do you?" I asked, not waiting for an answer. I flipped Haburi up and over my shoulder with one hand, spinning it as I did so.

Both ninja tensed for the attack, but I simply smashed the hammer straight into the ground in front of me.

Blondie started to smirk. "Too weak to handle your own weapon, un?" he taunted, obviously thinking I'd been about to attack him. I snorted and moved Haburi out of the way so he could see the seal clearly imprinted into the ground.

"The one and only Mischief Maker, at your service, bitches," I said, stepping back and bowing theatrically. "Oh, and by the way, Blondie," I said casually. "I could take you down with this hammer using one hand, and not even break a sweat. So don't push me, un," I said, mimicking his strange speech habit.

Blondie growled and reached inside his cloak for something, but Cornie's hand stopped him. "Now is not the time to pick a fight, Deidara," he said, again showing no emotion in his voice. "Leader-sama wants this one alive."

Suddenly something clicked in my brain. "Oh, hey, I know you guys now!" I said, as the realization came to me. "You're both a part of the Akatsuki! Of course, how I could I not have seen that before?" I shook my head at my absentmindedness.

Blondie, supposedly called Deidara, smirked at me again. "I guess that your tiny body also came with a tiny brain, yeah," he said to me.

I growled at him. "At least I'm not a cross-dresser!" At this Deidara became truly furious; he tried to launch himself at me, trying to beat me to a pulp. Luckily, Cornie stopped him, or I might have had to smash his head with my hammer.

A long sigh escaped from the strange man, and I suspected his patience was wearing thin. "Deidara. Please remember the mission. No unnecessary harm is to come to her, or Leader-sama will kill you." The way he said the words made me think that the guy wasn't using the phrase as a figure of speech.

Deidara growled again, but finally backed down, glaring daggers at me like it was my fault he wasn't allowed to kill me.

I smiled at him innocently. "Honey, everyone wishes that looks could kill. Trying it out isn't going to make it happen."

Ignoring Deidara's evil looks- obviously he ignored my statement totally- I focused my attention back on Corn Rows. "Okay, so your leader, head honcho at Akatsuki Headquarters, wants to meet with me. He doesn't want me to be hurt, and he would prefer if I came of my own will. I'm going to take a guess and assume he will ask me to join the Akatsuki. Am I right?"

The man's face gave away no emotion, but Deidara was easy to read as a book. He clearly didn't like the idea of having me in the Akatsuki as well; I could see the panic flash across his face just thinking about it.

I grinned at him cheekily. "What's the matter, Blondie? Not liking the idea of having me join your little group?" I turned to the redhead. "Alright. I'll come with you, to see what your leader has to say. I'm not making any guarantees, though. So you might still have a chance of getting out of this, Blondie," I said, throwing the last part over my shoulder at Deidara.

"It's Deidara, Midget," he growled, and by the way he said it, I could tell that it would be my new nickname. Fine. I suppose it was only fair. Why did it have to be Midget, though? I would've been perfectly fine with names like Emo-Girl, Gothie, Blackie, Hammerhead… anything but Midget!

The weird one turned to leave, with Deidara following behind. Returning Haburi to its sheath, I jumped after them, Karasu silently winging her way behind me.

We headed deeper into the forest, where the trees were larger and older, and the ground was always covered with undergrowth and fallen leaves. Not many people came here. Dangerous things lived in the deep woods, things that attacked in broad daylight as well as night, and I had the scars and scrapes to prove it.

We traveled for so long I began to wonder if they were pulling my leg on this after all. Finally, though, Cornie stopped.

We were standing in front of a river, with a gate sitting at the bottom of it, in front of a large rock. We jumped down onto the water in front of it, and I gaped at the actual size of the stone up close.

"Wow. That is one big-ass rock," I stated. Deidara snorted, but there was hardly a muscle twitch from the guy. That man was one hard nut to crack, let me tell you.

Said man walked over to the rock, which had a "Forbidden" seal on it, and made a hand sign. The rock slid out of the way, leaving a large gaping hole in the side of the cliff that contained the river.

I had to admit, it was impressive, if a little obvious, with the seal and the gate standing right in front of it.

"Wow," I commented idly. "You guys sure know how to make an impression. Consider me interested, especially if I get to know how to do that wicked move." Deidara snorted and muttered something that probably had something to do with my intelligence level, but Cornie said nothing. Jeez, I really wish I knew what his name was. It was starting to bug me.

Whistling shrilly, I called Karasu to my side. I knew she preferred the open air, and enclosed spaces made her nervous. Plus, there was no way she could hide while we were all in that tunnel. The sound of her wings flapping would bounce off the walls and be heard by the two Akatsuki members.

Deidara looked surprised to not have noticed the bird, while the guy still didn't show any emotion. I pointed to each ninja as I introduced them to Karasu.

"Blondie over there is Deidara, and the weird one… well, I don't know his name. Care to tell me?" I asked the man.

"Akasuna no Sasori," he answered with irritation, before turning around and heading into the tunnel. Deidara hurried after him, and I let out a sigh of resignation before following them both, pondering the guy's name. I knew it from somewhere…who was he again?

"How rude of them," I muttered to Karasu. "I didn't even get to introduce you."

Karasu flapped her wings and nipped my ear affectionately; I guess that didn't matter to her. Oh well. At least I knew the guy's name now.

We walked into a huge cavern as the Big-Ass Rock, as I had dubbed it, slid back into place with a slow grinding sound, leaving us in near-darkness. The few torches I could see weren't nearly enough to light up the whole of the huge space, but they at least gave me an idea of how big this place was.

It was fuckin huge!

And totally empty, weirdly enough. Deidara and Sasori quickly walked the length of the cavern, leaving me trotting to catch up and still marveling at the size of the place.

Reaching a tunnel tucked away behind a pile of rocks, Deidara and Sasori ducked inside without waiting for me to catch up. Mildly pissed, I hurried to catch up and not be left behind, wondering where it was that we were actually going.

The tunnel was dark, with hardly a torch to light our way. Luckily, the stone we walked on was smooth, and my night vision was pretty good, so I didn't have much of a problem.

What I did have a problem with, though was the length of this goddamn tunnel. It seemed like it would never end! We just kept walking, and walking, and walking, and _walking_…

Just as I was about to do a little kid routine and ask how much longer we had, Sasori stopped in front of a door. It was imbedded in the stone and was made of a dark metal that I couldn't identify. There was no handle on this side, and I wondered how we would get in.

What I had been expecting was for Sasori to bust out with some more hand signs like he had with the Big-Ass Rock, but instead he did something very simple: he reached forward and knocked on the door.

As he did so, I finally remembered who Akasuna no Sasori was. Luckily, my gasp of surprise was lost in the knocking, so I didn't make a fool of myself in front of these guys.

Akasuna no Sasori, the Scorpion of the Red Sands. To run into him, and to possibly work on the same side as he… this truly was a powerful group. I began to wonder who else considered themselves a part of the Akatsuki, and why they wanted me, a lowly troublemaker, to join them.

My pondering was cut short as a voice on the other side of the door demanded, "Who's there?"

Deidara sighed irritably. "Tobi, let us in, un!" he called out. There was a pause. Then, the door swung open so hard that it crashed against the stone wall, sending a resounding _boom_ that rattled my bones.

Deidara winced. "Thanks, yeah," he said, walking past Tobi, who followed after Deidara adoringly, like a lost puppy.

"Hello, Deidara-sempai! Tobi is a good boy! I was appointed gate keeper, and I did a good job, yes Deidara-sempai?" Tobi stopped in his babbling and looked at Deidara with eyes to match his puppy-like behavior.

Or eye, I realized as I looked closer. Tobi's entire face was hidden by an orange mask, with a single eye hole on the right so that he could see. And the eye I saw creeped me out more than I'd like to admit. It was all red, and what little skin around it that could be seen looked blackened, damaged somehow.

Tobi lacked the ring that Sasori and Deidara both wore, but he had the cloak. He had short black hair, and his weird speech habits, as well as the mask, made it difficult to guess his age.

"Jeez, is everyone here as…weird, as you people?" I muttered, loud enough for only Deidara to hear. His face twisted in rage, and I had to hide my satisfaction. The guy was too easy to provoke, and he flew into rages over the simplest of things. Oh yeah, I was going to have a ball here.

Deidara looked ready to leap at me and tear my throat out, but he was stopped by a quick look from Sasori.

"Deidara, you know you aren't allowed to hurt her," Sasori said, the tone of his voice giving me the impression that he didn't really care either way if Deidara ripped me to shreds, but orders were orders. Deidara submitted reluctantly, glowering at me as he muttered, "Yes, Danna."

I blinked in surprise. Danna? Deidara actually _respected _puppet boy? Master was quite a lofty title to give to someone when you had a temper like Deidara's, in my opinion. I guess I shouldn't judge a book by just its cover or the summary on the back. Apparently the acknowledgements mattered, too.

We were in a dimly lit corridor, and as Tobi pulled the heavy metal door shut- and quite easily, I might add- it seemed to get darker, more sinister. Torches guttered in sconces on the wall, and moisture dripped down to form puddles on the floor. I didn't like the atmosphere in here so far, but I wasn't about to show my trepidation to any of these clowns.

"Nice foyer," I muttered as we walked down the hall. "I bet everyone compliments your good taste in furnishings, and how welcoming you make the place feel. The torches are a nice touch."

Deidara snickered, and it was clear Tobi didn't get it.

"Oh, no, person with a large hammer, the entrance to the base is meant to be scary. That way, prisoners will be more willing to talk." Tobi said this matter-of-factly, and I grinned at him lopsidedly, playing along.

"Oh, how silly of me. I'm sorry Tobi, of course the entrance to the hideout is scary. It serves its purpose well." Out of the corner of my eye, I could see Deidara grinning. He was enjoying how I played along with Tobi like I would a little kid. I wasn't sure why he acted the way he did, but something about him was appealing. Not in a sexual way, just a brother-sister protectiveness kind of way. It had been a long time since I'd felt like that.

I swallowed the sudden lump in my throat and held out my hand to Tobi, who stared at it in surprise. I giggled. "Take the hand, Tobi. It's called a handshake."

Tentatively, as if he were afraid I might bite him, Tobi took my hand, and I shook it slowly. "Nice to meet you, Tobi," I told him. "I'm Kuroi. People also call me the Mischief Maker." I gestured to Karasu, who fluttered her wings in greeting. "This is my trusty partner, Karasu. We've been together for a long time."

Tobi stared at Karasu in fascination. He reached out a hand, and I stopped it before he grabbed at her.

"No, Tobi. Like this," I said. I put all of his fingers down except for his index, and slowly brought it up to Karasu, who dipped her head and allowed herself to be stroked. I let his hand go, and Tobi continued petting Karasu with a look of delight in his eye. I felt a slow smile spread across my face. I really liked Tobi, and I could tell Karasu approved of him too. Just by the way she was letting him stroke her, I could tell. If we agreed to this leader's conditions, Tobi would probably be our first friend in the base, if S-ranked criminals did that sort of thing. Tobi certainly did. But then again, I didn't really know who the guy was, so he might be as innocent as he appeared…

Or maybe not.

We were lead by Sasori through seemingly endless corridors, all made of stone, with torches as the only light. It made me wonder what kind of people actually lived in a gloomy place like this. I wasn't exactly Miss Sunshine-And-Rainbows all the time, but I wasn't depressed, either. Though, living in this place might make me become it…

At last, we stopped before a set of doors. Somehow, this place was darker than the rest, and I don't just mean literally. The place seemed to seethe with a sort of malignant presence, located behind those iron doors.

Again, Sasori knocked, his knuckles sounding hollowly on the metal. We waited a moment, then a voice called out, "State your name." Surprisingly, it was female. I frowned. Did this mean that the leader of the Akatsuki was a girl? Or was there someone else in the room, acting as a guard?

"It is Sasori and Deidara," Sasori called. "We have returned from our mission successfully. The girl is unharmed and has come of her own will, as promised."

I snorted and rolled my eyes, despite the seriousness of the situation. "I have a name, you know," I reminded everyone. Sasori ignored me, waiting for a response from within the leader's chamber. I thought I heard a quiet chuckle, which I suspected came from Deidara. Weird. I'd already had him pegged as a jerk, one who would be disdainful of my wise-ass comments, not amused by them. Maybe he just thought it was funny that I was trying to piss off the boss, putting on a show of bravado.

Or maybe it was because comments like that could get me killed.

I suppressed a slight shiver at the thought, and returned to the present, just as the iron doors creaked open ominously. There was no light shining from within the room, and all I could see inside was blackness. A gaping mouth of despair.

Great. What a nice way to start my interview with the boss. Taking a deep breath, I braced myself and stepped forward, through the door and into the darkness beyond.

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** oh, Disclaimer**: keep dreaming, honey. just keep dreaming. you wish i owned this shit! Kuroi and Karasu are both mine, just so you know. oh, and i made some crap up regarding the base.  
...okay, lots of crap. just gimme a break, okay? how am i supposed to know the inner workings of Kishimoto-sama's mind? just deal with it, please? and thank you!


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